Thoughts of a Child
by FandomlyChallenged
Summary: Chloe is a girl who is bullied badly at the school she goes to, her home life isn't much better. We follow her experience and how she deals with her depression and suicidal thoughts, both positively and negatively. There will be multiple triggering scenes. If you need help, reach out to me or a trusted person. Not every person will leave and not every ending will be sad.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_I can't eat. I haven't eaten in a few days. I am not skinny enough. I'm fat and ugly._ I think sadly to myself as I walk with my head down, being pushed around. _School is hard. Everyone hurts me._ I fall, slamming into an ugly white locker.

"Watch where you are going you fat fuck. No one likes you. Why don't you just kill yourself?" a male voice says. I look up, even though I already know who it is. The flash of his expensive clothes and football that always seems to be in his hand.

_If only my life was like a movie, where he falls in love with me and we live happily ever after. Sadly, my life isn't a happy love story. He has no heart. He doesn't care about me. I really think he enjoys hurting me._ I fight back tears and try to avoid eye contact.

"That's right, you fat bitch, cry. Go cry and cut like the ugly cunt you are."

I whimper but don't cry, he kicks me in the ribs before walking off. I stand up and try to catch my breath as I rush to class. I wipe the unshed tears away and rub my ribs as I slide into my desk just as the bell rings.

_This is going to bruise. _I think sadly as I rub the spot Hunter kicked. I look around the room, it's a small classroom compared to the others. The desks are bunched together with barely enough room to walk through. The room is our signature colors, white and gold, two walls of each color. The wall is decorated with posters that are falling down even though school just started. Once the teacher stops talking, giving us time to work on homework, I get a note. A small burst of excitement goes through me before it dies. I for some reason thought it was someone trying to be nice but I don't deserve nice things. _Why would I be stupid enough to think it was someone being nice to me. I am a pathetic excuse for a person. _I open the note and hear giggling behind me as I read it.

I wish you would just kill yourself. You are pathetic and should just die. You would be doing the world a favor if you just killed yourself. You don't deserve food, love, you don't deserve to fucking breathe you fat slut. Chloe, why don't you just die? I can't wait for our "date"

\- Your "friend" Arian

_Wow, she actually knows my name. Arian is Hunter's girlfriend. She is perfectly skinny. She is right. I think as tears start forming. I don't deserve food. I don't deserve to live. I don't know why I've held on for so long. It's pointless._

I crush the note and shove it in my pocket as I shakily stand. I don't want her to hurt me. She calls it our "date". She is like Hunter. I walk shakily to the teacher, trying not to fall. When I get close to his desk, someone trips me and I land face first as everyone laughs. I finally get to the teacher after many mean comments and whispers about me, and I try to stand and control the shaking in my whole body.

"C-can... M-may I-I g-go t-to th-the b-b-bathroom?" I stutter out.

The teacher looks up from his phone and waves me away, wincing and quickly looking away as he sees who I am. I take that as a yes and I barely avoid falling as I all but run to the bathroom. I start crying as I slam the door to the largest stall. I start digging through my bag, hardly able to see through the tears filling my eyes. I finally find what I am looking for as it slices my finger. I pull out my favorite razor blade. _A perfect blade. _It originally was part of a box cutter and is perfectly sharp. I quickly pull down the sleeve of the sweater I always wear and take a deep breath. I slice my wrist, not trying to be careful this time.

_Maybe I can cut deep enough and I will die. _I think as I watch the blood flow, fascinated.

Cutters' high.

It has always been my favorite part of cutting. I sit and watch the blood flow out until the bell rings, signifying the end of class. I swear and wipe the blood off my arm, not bothering to clean the blood on the floor. I pull down my sleeve as I open the door to the bathroom, running straight into Arian.

"What are you doing here you fat bitch?" she says as she glares at me.

"I-I was u-using t-the b-bathroom?" I mumble and look to the ground, hoping she won't do anything this time. Just as I think she is going to leave me alone, she grabs my chin and jerks it up so I am looking at her.

"No one cares about you. We all hate you. Every single fucking one of us." She looks down at my arm before looking back up to me with a sneer on her face, "Did the poor fat bitch cut?" She spits in my face and lets go of me. I try to step away from her when she punches me in the nose. She laughs and then turns to the mirror, signaling that she is done with me, at least for now. Blood drips from my nose and my arm as I walk out of the bathroom. I keep my head down and walk as fast as I can to class. Somehow I manage to get there without any more harm and I sigh as I sit down and wipe the remaining spit from my face.

_Just one more class. _I think to myself as I sit down. _At least this is my favorite class, and it's a bonus that they aren't in it. I just have to wait until after lunch until it starts._

I sit in my desk and read until lunch is over. The teacher pounds on her desk as the bell rings and signs good afternoon. I eagerly sign back and class starts. About halfway through the class, just as we finish reviewing our new learning, she signs that we are going on an adventure. I look up at her, in confusion and fear. She looks at me with kind eyes and signs quietly to me,

"Don't worry, they won't be there. I wish you would let me help, even just to patch you up or to talk. You don't have to do this alone. How bad is it?"

"Don't worry, it's not too bad" I sign back, doing my best to hide my wince as I brush against my new cuts, "And I told you, if I don't go home with back home with some marks, I'll end up with worse ones."

"I know, I still wish I could help-"

I cut her off and sign, "If the police won't help me, you can't. I have made it this far, I can hang on. And hey, as long as I have your class, I won't go insane." I force a smile and she smiles back.

"Okay. And don't worry hun, you'll like our adventure" She hurries to the front of the students eagerly signing to each other trying to figure out where we are going. Eventually, we end up in the music wing. Our teacher waves us towards a classroom full of kids singing. We all crowd in and I stare at the class in awe, tearing up a bit. My teacher starts signing, explaining something as she gives me a knowing smile.

I've never seen anything like this. They are such a community.

Once the choir stops singing, I clap quietly. The choir teacher comes over and talks to us, amazing me with the signing she does to include my teacher. The choir starts talking about the song, not the whispers I am used to. The choir teacher talks to us about the choir and tells us we could join if we want.

"You should join Chloe" My teacher signs quietly to me

"I am scared, I won't fit in"

"Please? Just try out, for me."

"Fiine" I sign back, using a bit of attitude.

My class walks back to our room and I stay behind to try to talk to the teacher. She immediately walks over to me and starts talking to me.

"You want to join the choir? We would love to have you." She smiles invitingly and I search her face for any sign she is faking a smile but I see none.

After a deep breath, I hesitantly say, "S-sure"

"Yay! I'm so glad! We could always use more singers." As she says this, the whole class turns and murmurs in agreement. I look down at the floor and try to stammer out a response but she turns to the class and gives them instructions before I get anything out.

"Discuss what the song means to you and how you can convey that meaning."

She grabs my hand and I try not to freak out as she pulls me towards a room. Above it, I just make out the words "Sink Room" before she pulls me all the way inside and closes the door.

"You need to audition but don't worry, it's just a formality. Whether or not you can sing well doesn't matter, we are just trying to judge your skill level so we can put you with the right group." She starts playing the piano before handing me some sheet music. "Look it over and when you're ready, we can start."

As I look it over, blood continues to drip down my arm. _She must not know who I am. She actually looks straight at me. The only teacher who does that anymore is Mrs. Bradley, my ASL teacher._

I tell her I am ready and I start singing, she looks at me with utter amazement for a second before continuing to play. I duck my head down and continue to sing, thinking the worst; but when I look back up at her, I see a strange emotion, pride. I smile at her as she tells me "You are amazing, I'd love to have you in my class. With such an amazing voice, it's a wonder that you haven't joined sooner."

I blush and nod my head, wrapping my sleeve tightly around my arm to help stop the blood flow. The bell rings and I politely say goodbye to her after she tells me that she will try to put me into choir as soon as she can. As I walk out of the large double doors onto the pavement, my music blaring so I can't hear the comments people are making. I get pushed and shoved by several people but manage to stay on my feet. Eventually, I get past the large crowd of people but I whimper as I see Hunter.

_I should have known he wouldn't let me leave without saying goodbye._ He walks up to me and he glares at me as if I just killed his loved ones. I stifle a whimper as he throws me down to the ground and kicks me. Despite how hard I try, I start crying, my ribs on fire before he finally walks away. I lay on the ground, crying and bleeding everywhere. Hopefully, nothing is broken. I cry out as I get up, glad everyone has all but left.

I look at my watch and swear as I see how late it is. _Shit, it's already 2:40?! He is going to kill me._ I walk as fast as I can, biting my lip till it bleeds to keep quiet. _If only someone would listen. Just one person to help me. I've told teachers and counselors. Fuck, I've even called the cops yet no one helps. They think I am making it up because I am a "child". I am too young to have problems other than what I should wear. Fucking stupid. I don't understand how people can let this happen. "Children" can't go through such horrible things. It's so fucking stupid. They all think I am making it up. They think I am exaggerating it to get attention. Teachers used to talk to me, have me answer questions in school, yet now they can't even look me in the eyes. And I'm the weak one. The only one who tried to help is my ASL teacher, but she can't do anything._


	2. Chapter 2

I finally limp my way up the stairs of my home and try to open the door quietly. The first thing I smell is alcohol and I silently hope he is passed out. I close the door and tiptoe to the living room. I hear the clinking of glasses and swear silently. As I get closer I hear the sound of his friends. I try to sneak past but my dad sees me.

"What are you doing home so late you fucking cunt" he says to me, then he turns to his friends and says "You can never find a good bitch." They laugh and agree and I think I make out someone saying something like, "But least she is a good looking bitch, she must be fun to play with."

I shudder and try to go to my room but my dad reaches out and grabs my arm, pulling me onto his lap. "Dinner was supposed to be cooking by now bitch. Me and my friends are fucking hungry."

"I know Dad but I was in school." I say over the sound of his friends agreeing with him. He slaps me and grabs my throat roughly.

"That isn't what you are supposed to call me." He growls low, his face close enough to my face where I can smell the stench of beer.

I gasp and struggle to breathe as I mutter, "I-I'm s-sorry D-Daddy."

"That's better bitch." He lets go of my neck and his hand travels down my body, eventually resting on my thigh.

"I-I h-have to s-start d-dinner D-Daddy" I squeak out, hoping he won't do anything tonight.

"I think you have to make it up to me and my friends for being late." I whimper but nod my head yes, knowing better than to argue. This has been going on for seven years and I've learned it is faster to agree.

He gets what he wants either way. It is up to me how long it lasts and how much I get hurt. He pushes me off his lap and he laughs along with his friends. I undo his pants and close my eyes as one of his friends comes up behind me and rubs my ass. I try to pull away but he grabs my pants and uses my motion to help pull them off. After a while they all pass out, whether from the alcohol or from the orgasms, I don't know, and I lay on the floor for a few seconds, breathing hard.

_This has been going on for so long and yet every time feels like the first time._ I start crying as I go to make dinner and I let out a small whimper as I see the time. 4:38. I search through the cabinets, not finding much food. I have to go shopping soon, which means I need to try to work as much as possible. I pull out some Mac & Cheese and set that on the stove while I go into my room to change into my work outfit. As I finish the food my stomach lets out a growl, but I don't eat. I put on some makeup to hide the bruises and clean everything up before walking as fast as I can to my job. I get there just in time, I let out a sigh and start serving food. No one talks to me, other than a few thank yous here and there, and it is a welcome reprieve from home and school. I get hardly any tips today and I let out a sad sigh before painting a smile on my face, knowing from experience that it looks like I am actually happy. I walk towards a table, where someone just sat down in.

"How may I help you today?" I say in a blithe voice, but not annoyingly blithe.

"Um... yeah... What's good here?" A young girl, just a bit older than me asks. She is a skinny, blonde, blue eyed girl.

I wish I looked like that I think to myself as I say, "Well, I always wanted to taste the steak but it's about $15."

"That sounds really good." she says, her voice sounding genuine.

"Wonderful, and to drink?" I say, liking this girl. _If only I wasn't so fat and ugly, then maybe we could be friends. She probably thinks I am pathetic. I must have done something bad for her not to want me to serve her. I need to remember to punish myself for that later. _I pause at that thought and shake my head slowly. _Hunter would be so proud. I am punishing myself for every little thing._

"Just a Root Beer" she says

"Sure" I walk away and go put the order in and grab her Root Beer. I head back to her table after giving a few other tables their drinks. Before I get very far, I feel my manager grab my arm. I quickly pull away and thankfully he lets me go this time. He looks me up and down and I suppress a shudder.

"Your father said-"

"I need to go give this to a customer" I say, cutting him off

He walks with me back to the table with the girl and she smiles at me.

"Thank you for the drink." she says, not noticing my manager at first, "Oh, I'm sorry, who are you?" she says, looking at my manager and eyeing the way he has his arm on my waist.

"Why would you want this bi- um... HER to serve you when we have much better waitresses" he says to her.

She stands and stretches to her full height, taller than I expected, and says, "I don't care; I want her to serve me"

"As you wish." He says after a moment's hesitation, sounding defeated.

"Good, thank you." She seems really proud of herself as she waves him off and sits back down. He sputters and storms off as she turns to me. "I hope he doesn't do that often" she says while looking at me with sympathy.

I really don't understand why she wants me to serve her but I say nothing as I slink off and serve other people. Once her order is ready I set her food in front of her and she claps her hands.

"Oh, this looks amazing! Thank you so much!" She starts eating immediately as I blush and go to get her some more Root Beer. She grabs my arm, directly where my cuts are, I yelp in pain and pull my arm away. I instantly panic and think she is going to hurt me but get a shock when she says, "Oh, I am so sorry."

_Sorry? Someone said sorry to me? She must be new around here._

"I didn't mean to startle you or hurt you. I just wanted to tell you that this is delicious. Thank you so much for recommending this. I knew I could count on you."

_Not only did she say sorry, now she is thanking ME? This is so strange._

"Yeah, it's nothing" I say, mentally congratulating myself for not stuttering.

"What time do you get off?"

"M-me? I-I... um... I usually stay as long as I can to get enough mon-... Um... Sorry, you probably don't care. I think I will be working for 6 more hours.

"I do care. When did you start your shift today?"

"5 o'clock"

"5?! But it's already midnight. Don't you have school tomorrow?"

"Yeah? I will finish up around here around 6 and then I will rush home, make breakfast for my dad, change then run to school." I say, getting slightly nervous.

"No no no. That won't do. I want you to end your shift now, you need to sleep."

"But I need the money and my manager would never let me go."

"Trust me, I'll take care of it. Can I get the check?"

I leave to go get her check and when I return, I find her missing, so I set it on the table and continue to serve everyone else. By the time I make my way back around to her table, I see her holding the check and smiling.

_She has a really pretty smile._

"I told you I'd take care of it. Here." she hands me the check and I gasp.

"W-what is this?"

"It's the money I owe, plus a tip, of course." she says as if it's no big deal.

"There is a least a $100 here!" I say, clearly shocked

"I know, now hurry up and please get me a receipt."

I hurry and do as she asks, putting the large tip into my pocket. I bite my lip as I make my way back towards her, luckily not running into any of my coworkers. She takes my hand and smiles like she is the happiest person in the world right now. "How did you get here?"

"I walked?" it somehow ends up coming out as a question instead of the statement I had meant it to be.

"But it's so cold!"

"It's not that bad" but just as I say that, I shiver, proving her point.

"Come on, let me give you a ride. It's no big deal." I think about it for a second but I eventually get in. "Good, you wouldn't have won that battle anyway." she says with a small smile and I laugh, a real laugh. It is a strange feeling but I like it. She starts driving and then she gasps and turns up the radio. "This is my favorite song!" I smile and listen to it, humming along. She smiles encouragingly and before continuing to sing her heart out. When the song finishes she asks me where I live. I give her directions to the park near my house and she drives that way. "I live near there as well." she says. I nod and make a sound of acknowledgement. I wonder what she will think when she pulls into the park. Hopefully she will understand. The closer we get the more antsy I get, I bite my lip. She looks at me before smacking her head.

"You need my number, what am I thinking" she points to her phone, "the password is 6665556544, add your number to my phone and I'll text you, okay?" She is watching the road so she doesn't see my surprised and confused expression. I hesitantly add my number to her phone before setting it down. When I look up again she is pulling into the park.  
She smiles and laughs, "No wonder the address was familiar, it's the park! That's really smart, I probably sounded really creepy, asking for your address and all that." she gives me a warm smile and touches my shoulder. I turn my head so she doesn't see me flinch.

"Thanks for the ride, I really appreciate it" I say as I open the door.

Just as I close it she calls out "Anytime, see you around friend." I smile and wave as she pulls out of the park, probably heading home. I look at my watch and swear.

_Fuck. If I go home now I'll be hurt. Maybe, he'll be passed out. I can't go anywhere else and it's too cold to stay outside. _

Having made up my mind I start walking home, it takes about 5 minutes. I try to silently open the door, I get to the main hallway and as I take off my shoes I hear them.

_Fuck! _I bite my lip to keep quiet and I tiptoe upstairs, as I walk I end up falling head first into the ground.

_Shit. Fuck. Damn it. _I look down to see what tripped me, I see shoes and empty beer cans. _There is no way they didn't hear that._

I slowly get up before I hear them talk about me.

"Is that your slut?"

"Finally, I've been waiting to nut"

"Call her in here"

Finally I hear what I've been dreading. My dad calls out "Come here Claire, come take care of me and my friends"

I slowly make my way towards them. My dad and his 3 drunk friends. When I walk in, they all catcall and whistle. I glare at the floor as I stop in front of my dad's chair. "Yes Daddy? How may I help you?"

"On your knees, now!" he yells as his friends get up and circle around me.

"Y-yes Daddy" I whimper as I fall to my knees. My dad hits me in the face as they all all take their pants off.

"Be a good little cum slut now." he says as his friend chimes in, "Yeah, we know you like this" Everyone agrees with him. Someone pushes me to the ground and tries to rip my uniform.

"P-please, let me take it off!"

After a small argument I quickly take my uniform off, throwing it to the side to save it from being ripped. They all cheer as the see me undress, a few start to jerk off as I get fully naked.

I yelp as I am forcibly shoved onto all fours, someone shoves a finger into my pussy and calls out "Fuck, the little slut is so wet right now, and so fucking tight"

Everyone calls out various names, making me tear up. My dad effortlessly picks me up and forcibly shoves himself inside of me, making me moan out in pain. The guys get a kick out of that and one shoves himself in my mouth, slamming all the way down my throat, causing me to gag.

I whimper around him, thinking that this will be all I have to take before my dad calls out, "Someone, fuck her ass"

I gasp and try to struggle because they've never used my ass before. My dad sees my expression and groans, he slows down a bit while someone rubs their dick up and down my ass. I try to shake my head no but the guy behind me grips my sides hard and slams into me. I scream around the cock in my mouth but everyone seems to get a kick out of that. My dad and the guy behind me fuck me at a hard, fast pace, making me cry. The guy in my mouth grips my hair and shoves my all the way down on his dick, cause me to whimper. He cum down my throat and I swallow. When he pulls out he slaps my face hard, causing me to moan in pain again. My dad and the guy behind me are getting close to finishing, they increase their pace as they talk about how much of a slut, a cumwhore, I am. I moan and try to bite my lip, realizing I'm getting close to an orgasm.

Upon seeing this, my dad slams me down harder, calling out to his friends, "Look at the little slut, she is going to cum!"

I shake my head no but seconds later I am moaning uncontrollably and cumming hard, soon followed by my dad and the other guy. I am just starting to come down from my orgasm as the last guy pulls me off of them and slams me down on him, causing me to orgasm again. He moans and bites my neck hard and slapping my ass. I whimper as I come down again, feeling like a toy as he roughly lifts me up and slams me back down. A few more minutes of this and he cums in me, I finally breathe and look around. Thankfully everyone passed out. Not chancing my luck I quickly clean up the room, knowing I'll be punished if I don't, before grabbing my stuff and running to the shower. When I get in I break down and cry, angrily scrubbing every inch of my body. When I am sore and red, I get out. I continue to cry as I get dressed. I rush to my room, locking the door and moving my desk in front of it. I tear my room apart, searching. At last, I finally find it. My blade. I let out a broken laugh as I walk to my room, not bothering to clean up. I pull up my sleeve, exposing my scared arm. I trace the scars with my finger before cutting deeply several times. I let out a sob and fall back on my bed. I slowly get up and wrap my arm, not wanting to get blood everywhere. I fall back on my bed and almost pass out. My phone buzzes and I almost don't check it, thinking it will be one of my bullies.

When my eyes finally focus I look at my phone in confusion, it says, "Hey bestie! I hope you got home okay and I hope we can hang out again soon! - Nat"

After a few more seconds of staring at my phone, I remember the girl who drove me home.

_Her name must be Nat._ I take a breath and smile, bringing my phone closer to me. I write and rewrite a text, chewing my lip as I think of a good response.

Eventually I type, "Yeah, I got home safe" I let out a small chuckle here.

_If only she knew that the danger lives in the same house as me._ "**I** would love to see you again but my schedule is pretty booked, sorry" I finally hit send, I bite my lip and rethink the text.

_I sound like an idiot._ I manage to stay up just long enough to hear my phone go off.


	3. Chapter 3

Groggily I wake up, I look around, trying to make the room come into focus. The room finally comes into focus and I jerk upright, wincing in pain as I do. I look at the clock and let out a sigh of relief.

_It's just around the time I would normally get up. I'm okay. _I get my clothes and head to the bathroom as I check my phone.

**THREE NEW MESSAGES, **it flashes at me. I open it just as I get into the bathroom.

Nat - It's okay, tell me when you work next

Nat - Or maybe study together?

Nat - Or walk to school together…..?

_Shit, I didn't answer her, she probably thinks I hate her!_

Quickly I type a text, 'Yeah, we can walk to school together, if you want. I'm leaving the house soon. Also I am sorry I didn't text back, I fell asleep.' I hit send and get dressed, cleaning my wound as well. I gingerly rinse my cuts, biting my lip as I do. When I finish and re bandage my wound, I look at my phone. No new messages. I let out a slow sigh.

_What was I expecting? Why would she like me? _I glance at the clock and start to hurry. I grab my stuff and rush downstairs, thankfully he is asleep and his friends are gone. I make some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for him and rush outside. I look at my phone again,

**ONE NEW MESSAGE**.

Nat - I am at the park waiting

Me - I am on my way but I need to make a quick stop. I check my pocket to make sure I have my money for food.

Nat - Where do we have to go?

Me - I have to stop by the store to pick up some food. I won't have time to after school.

Nat - Don't worry, I can do it for you. It's not a problem, I don't have anything to do and I love shopping. What do you need?

Nat - Also, don't bother fighting

Me - Fine, I just need some smooth peanut butter, grape jelly, 2 things of white bread, loads of mac and cheese, and a four pack of butter.

I just hit send as I walk into the park, Nat spots me and immediately comes over. I attempt to say something about what just happened but she cuts me off.

"Don't worry about it, it gives me a reason to go shopping." She starts walking and I soon walk with her. I reach into my pocket and hand her the money.

"It's not a lot but it's all I have."

"It's okay, I will make do and get what I can." She smiles brightly at me and I smile back. We walk to school and we arrive early, just as I like to.

"We are here so early, do you always come so early?" she asks as we walk to my locker

"Yeah, I always come so early, it's easier that way." I reach my locker and quickly open it, putting my stuff in the locker and taking what I need.

"What do you mean, easier?"

"It doesn't matter, it's is silly really" I say as the school fills up. She nods and lets it slip, I smile gratefully.

"You shouldn't be seen around me, it could be bad for you."

"What do you mean?" Just as I am about to answer, Hunter spots me and knocks the stuff out of my hands. He slams me into the locker and I try to look at Nat, he follows my gaze and lets out a low chuckle.

He speaks low enough so that only I can hear, "You little bitch. What have I told you? You don't deserve friends. I'll help her realize how much of a bitch you are." He lets me fall down as he turns to Nat. He smiles and looks at her, she glares at him, not letting him get to her. He takes a half step back, almost seeming caught off guard, but he quickly recovers.

"Why would you hang out with someone like her when you could hang with a group like us?" He gestures to his group of friends, pretty, popular girls and strong, popular guys. I bite my lip to keep quiet, knowing that all of them are judgemental and shallow. I glance up at her and take a double take, she is flipping him off!

"I don't need you to tell me who I can and can't be friends with. And quite frankly, your "friends" seem fake. I'd rather stick with my real and interesting friend." she pushes past him and holds out a hand for me. I flinch before realizing she is trying to help me. I take her hand and let her help me up.

"Does he always do that to you?" she asks, concern in her voice

"You shouldn't have done that. He'll just hurt me worse and he might hurt you, it wasn't worth getting involved"

"I don't care what he will do to me. It was worth getting involved in because I care about you and you don't deserve that."

"It is nothing, I am used to it. You should go back and talk to him, forget about me."

She shakes her head before looking at me and smiling, "Hey, wanna skip?"

I look at her in surprise before nodding, "Yeah, that sounds good"

We walk outside and walk towards the park across the street, we both sit on the swings and gently swing as we talk.  
"How long has this been going on?"

"Being hurt by Hunter or by others?"

"Who else hurts you?"

I think about whether I want to answer, after a few seconds I sigh and say, "My dad…. He hurts me really bad." I pause and try not to cry, "He beats me and rapes me, sometimes his friends join in to. He is always drunk, that's why I'm always working, to support him. To pay the bills and pay for food."

She looks at me, tears falling down her face, "Can I hug you?"

"Yeah"

She gets off the swing and hugs me tight, I smile sadly and lean into her.

"This feels nice, thank you."

"No problem. Hey, I can help you out! You'll be able to focus on school instead of going to work. And before you say that it's not fair or you don't want to take from me, I don't care. I'd be glad to help you, I promise. And it's not like we don't have enough money, we have loads. And you can sleepover anytime you want because we have such a big house and….."

I interrupt her "Thank you, for everything. It means so much to me. It feels nice to be able to talk to someone about this. I don't feel so alone."

"Don't mention it hun, I will always be here for you." She pauses for a second, looking slightly confused. "Hey, Chloe? Why haven't you told anyone? Why haven't you gone to the cops? Someone could take you away from him."

I smile sadly, wiping my eyes, "I have tried, I have told cops and teachers, no one believes me. They think because I am a "child" that this can't happen to me. And they think the marks are fake, or that I did them to myself."

She lets out a pitiful whimper and I feel bad. "Don't be sad, I'm used to it, 7 years of this. No worries, you are already doing so much to help me." She looks at me and I am shocked, she isn't looking at me with disgust, she looks at me with sympathy.

_I could kiss her right now, I am so happy she doesn't think I am horrible. _

"Hey, how about we go to my house? Relax and take it easy" she says to me with a beaming smile. Her happiness is contagious and I smile back.

_Wow, I am actually, genuinely smiling. She actually made me smile!_

"I would love to… if you don't mind that is."

"No worries, I would love for you to come to my house. It has been so long since I have had a friend over!' she gets up and claps her hands, doing what I think is a happy dance.

"Why are you dancing?" she laughs and I laugh too, covering my mouth as I do. I am surprised I am actually laughing.

"You look cute when you laugh, you stick out your tongue and I really like it. Also, I was dancing because I am so happy and excited for you to come over." I blush and look at the ground, moving my tongue back into my mouth.

"Thanks, let's head over to your house now" I stand up and almost fall, she quickly rushes over to me and grabs my waist, stabilizing me. I flinch and she notices, but she doesn't move her hands.

"I'm sorry I made you scared but I won't hurt you, I promise. And I know you won't be able to stop flinching everytime I touch you, at least not right away, but I just want you to know I won't hurt you." she smiles at me and I blush and smile back, realizing how close we are. She takes a deep breath and steps back, "Okay, let's go!" she reaches out her hand to me and I put mine in it after a few seconds of thought.

_She says she won't hurt me, this has got to be too good to be true. _

We arrive at her car and she unlocks it, jumping in and starting it. The music starts playing loudly and I'm glad it is loud because it covers the sound of my stomach. I look out the window so she doesn't see me grimace.

_I need food soon, I am getting weak and dizzy. I really don't want to eat though, because I've already lost a lot this week._

We get closer to her house and I feel safe, relaxing for the first time in a very long time. She looks over at me and smiles before singing out the last lines of the song. She stops the car just as the last line plays, I sing along just as she stops singing and closes her eyes.

"We get colder as we grow older, we will walk so much slower." She looks over at me in total shock, smiling huge, I blush hard.

"You sound so good! Are you joining choir? Oh, I hope you do, because I would love for you to be in my class!" she stops and blushes, "Sorry, I am rambling and probably making you uncomfortable."

"Hey, it's okay, you don't need to apologize to me and you can ramble all you want. I would rather listen than talk anyway. And to answer you question, I talked to the choir teacher, I did a test and she says I can get in."

"Oh, that was you? You are in ASL? That's so cool, do you think you can teach me?"

"Maybe, well, I can try. My teacher says I am the best and fastest learner, she also says I am an amazing teacher, but I'm not sure. I would love to teach you but I may not be that good at it."

"Hey, that's okay, you don't have to be perfect. Let's go inside" she opens her door and I soon follow her. I gasp and look at her house in awe.

"Yeah, I know, it is huge and amazingly beautiful, I know. You should see the inside. We even have several butlers!"

"Woah….."

The outside is a perfect shade white, no dirt or dust visible to mar how clean it looks. There are two marble columns holding a arch that has red roses along the middle, in between two lines. The only color maring the outside. There are large windows that I can't quite see into, as they are covered by beige drapes. On either side of the arch, below the windows, are brightly colored flowers that seem to be in perfect health.

"And you can come here anytime. And help yourself to anything." she unlocks the door with a key that she then hands to me. "It is for you, so you don't have to ask before you come over. I don't sleep at night, insomnia and such, so feel free to join me." she opens the door and my jaw drops further.

_I thought my jaw hit the floor when I saw they outside. My jaw must be 13 feet underground._

We walk into a wooden opening, with a coat rack on either side, also made of wood. The hooks are a perfectly polished silver, and the shelves don't seem to have any dust. The shoes, though there are few, are neatly placed under each coat, as if they belong to whoever owns the coat. Nat throws her school bag onto the shelf below the coat rack and kicking her shoes off, ruining the perfect fasade of perfectness.

"Don't worry about being neat, we have countless maids around, might as well make them do something." I nod my head and set my stuff on the shelf, kicking my shoes off as well. We start walking further into the house, and I gaze around eagerly, trying to see as much as I can. To my left, as we leave the hallway, I see a huge living room. There is a huge window covered by drapes which goes well with the wooden floors. Hanging on the wall is the largests T.V. I have ever seen, it had to be at least 80". There is one large couch and one loveseat, separated by a chair. On either side of the loveseat and couch there is a side table that is made of black wood, it contrasts the floors very well. When I look down I see a perfectly white rug.

_Wow, I wonder how they get the rug to stay so clean. The room looks both lived in and not, which is a weird combination. _

"No, no one actually uses the living room," she says as she looks back at me, "the maids know how to make it look that way though." I nod my head and rush after her. I glimpse a perfectly clean kitchen along with an extravagant dining area.

She stops in front of a closed door near the kitchen as she explains where we are, "This is the best room in the house, you know, besides my room." She laughs and opens the door, giggling as she hears me gasp. The room is a normal bedroom size, but instead of having a bed and stuff, it is full of all kinds of food. My stomach growls and I blush and hope she didn't hear it. She walks in, "What do you like? We have everything." she looks back at me and smiles encouragingly.

"I-I don't know, I usually don't eat much. I am trying to lose weight…" I trail off and stare at my feet. She looks at me sadly before grabbing a grey laundry basket.

"The maids always keep a basket in here for me, I tend to bring lots of food to my room." she hums as she starts to fill the basket. "Come on, grab some food. Anything you want, and don't worry about anything hun. I will show you something after we get food and put it in my room." I nod my head and start grabbing food, I make a small noise of surprise when I see Nerd Ropes and Cow Tails I instantly grab those and place them carefully in the basket, as if they are precious jewels.

She lets out a chuckle before nodding her head, "Good choice hun, now come on, let's go to my room. She walks out and I let out a laugh, the basket full of food sways precariously, looking as if it will tip over any second. She attempts to look back at me but the food is in the way so she shrugs her shoulders not thinking about being careful. I rush forward to catch the food that falls as she shrugs, letting out a gasp. I manage to catch it all and she laughs as she says, "Let's get to my room quick before anything else falls."

"Yeah, I can only catch so much perfectly before I manage to knock even more over." I let out a laugh as I say this and she laughs along. After walking a bit more, and having to catch a bit more food, we finally reach her room and she places the basket in a soft, cushioned pit. It is a giant blue rectangle that is a step down from the normal floor, it is all cushioned and it almost looks like a ball pit.

"This is my food spot, I usually eat here 'cause then I don't get crumbs on my bed." she explains to me as I look around her room. It is huge, about as big as two normal rooms, or about the size of our living room. She has a giant king sized bed near a window the bed is covered with pillows of various colors and two black blankets. The window is up kinda high, and it has a lip under it for someone, more like two someones, to sit on. There is a blue blanket on the lip, along with a pillow, and as I take a step closer, it looks as if the lip is cushioned as well. The walls are a deep blue, which goes well with a deep evergreen carpet. On one of the walls runs a bookcase that goes wall to wall and from ceiling to floor. It is full of many different kinds of authors, but they all seem to be fiction. There is a closed door that I assume go to a closet. Covering the walls are various posters, such as Supernatural, Stranger Things, Harry Potter, Five Nights at Freddy's, Mini Ladd, Markiplier, Jacksepticeye, along with many others. She laughs and nods, "I have a huge room and it has so many things. Now, I have something to show you." She leads me towards a door I didn't see before, and it opens into a huge bathroom. She takes my hand and I am surprised I don't flinch.

_I am just so comfortable with her, which will fuck me over in the end. She will leave just like everyone else did except hers will hurt really bad because she seems to care._

She stops in front of a scale and pulls over a curtain thingy. "This is going to sound weird but take your clothes off. Trust me, I won't peak." I bite my lip and start to speak, but before I get anything out, she says, "You think you need to lose weight and I am going to prove that you don't." I nod my head, and instantly bush because it's not like she can see me. I start taking off my clothes, and when I am done I cover my body, looking over to where she is. I see the outline of her and I relax a bit.

_I should have checked to make sure she wouldn't take pictures of me or make fun of me before I got undressed. At least it doesn't seem like she has her phone out. _I take a deep breath and ask, "Okay, now what?"

"Step onto the scale right in front of you" I look down and notice a scale, I move my clothes off of the scale and take another deep breath before stepping onto it.

"**145" **it calls out, and I cringe, letting out a small whimper.

_Hey, at least I'm losing weight! But I still am so fat…_

"See, I told you that you weren't fat! You weigh the same as me!" she calls out, making me jump and hurry to get my clothes on.

"I lost 30 lbs in the past 3 months, but I still weigh so much!" I smile sadly as I move towards her, finally fully clothed again. She tuts and when I see her face again I am shocked, she looks so sad, as if what I said hurt her. I walk close and slowly put my hand on her shoulder, trying to understand her sadness.

Her face softens and she looks more determined as she says, "You are a perfect weight and you have a body I would die for." she holds up a finger, as if she knew I was going to interrupt, "You may not see it, and others might not either because you cover your body up, but I promise you, I would kill for your body, and I love my body." she runs her hands over her body as she says that, letting out a small chuckle. Slowly, she grabs my hand, as if she was trying to make sure I didn't flinch, I give her a small smile and squeeze her hand. She leads me back to her room and we eat…. Well she eats…. I pick at the food and listen to her talk.

"And I never see them…" I tilt my head as I tune back in, after a second I realize she is talking about her parents. "They are always working. I hate it! I mean, they are good people…. I think… I don't remember them much. They were around when I was younger, but not for long. They never got me a nanny or put me in daycare, they just left me home alone at a young age. Like, who leaves a 3 year old home alone?! Especially in a house this big. At least I wasn't fully alone, there would always be a maid somewhere around the house, cleaning up my messes. I learned soon that no matter what I did, I wouldn't get their attention. So I stopped. I did what I wanted and stopped caring about their approval." she quiets down the longer she talked, until the last thing said was barely a whisper. I scoot closer to her and she lays her head on my shoulder, trying to hide the fact that she is crying. I lay there, doing my best to comfort her but not make it obvious I knew she was crying.

"That is absolutely horrible. You shouldn't have had to go through that. You deserve a family that cares about you and is there for you. I don't know how I would have gotten through that if I had to go through it." I tell her as I pet her hair, ignoring the sniffles. She shakes her head, as if trying to tell me it's not true, so I continue talking to her.

"You are so confident and you seem to know who you are, and that takes strength. You got through all of that and you made it out on top" I gently grab her arm and trace the vein on her wrist, "You got through that and you survived. You taught yourself, you did so many things and you didn't have as much help as many do. You were so young… and you did what you could. You did the best thing you could. And you are so sweet and special." she hugs me tighter and cries louder, making me sad.

_How can someone so perfect be so broken? How can her parents be so cruel to leave her? How can they not see how perfect she is, how amazing she is? _

We sit in silence for a while, I continue to pet her hair and hold her as her sniffles become less and I hear faint snores. I relax and close my eyes too, smiling slightly at her snores and soon sleep takes me as well.


End file.
